


Between Buck and Steve

by latethoughts



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Pining, Silly Steve, lil angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-05
Updated: 2019-05-03
Packaged: 2019-11-12 09:01:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,103
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18007901
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/latethoughts/pseuds/latethoughts
Summary: Being  best friends with Rogers was hard but you accepted the friendship and decided to move on, although Steve gets a bit jealous when you decide to get a bit closer to Bucky.





	1. 1

"Morning sweetie" Steve pecked you on the cheek, you two always woke up the earliest out of everyone and went for a run, usually dragging Sam along too.

"Good morning" you said with a mouthful of cereal, Steve and you always had a bit of light flirting in the morning to keep you up, it also helped with competition with races, not that you would ever actually win "is Sam up yet?"

"Nope, he's skipping today"

"Why?"

"Because I didn't wake him up" he grinned.

"You're cheeky, that won't last for too long though. Today's the day" you said with confidence.

"Really? Are you that sure?" He sat next to you and leaned in. His crystal blue eyes had a glint of mischief.

"100 metre race, on grass-" at that moment. Bucky walked in. Bucky is new but the two of you had grown closer since you were both friends of Steve.

"Good morning dollface, muscles" you grinned, he's only said that on a few occasions to you, Steve's nickname was amazing as well.

"What are you doing up so early?" Steve asked in a rude tone, you slapped his leg. Bucky sat down on the other side of you, just as close as Steve.

"What golden boy meant was, are you joining us for our run today?" The was something about Bucky that was enticing, you were always buzzing and in a happy mood whenever he appeared. You seem to be able to change his mood as well, he broods less and smiles more.

"Good idea sweetie, Bucky can be the timer" Steve ruffled Bucky's long locks then got up and put his dish in the sink. You touched Bucky's arm quickly.

"Don't worry we rotate, eat fast we're leaving soon" you said, Bucky smiled back at you. He felt a real connection with you, not like Steve's and his friendship but something different, something more. He was both afraid and touched by the idea of having you as a potential partner.

**Central Park**

"Okay, warm ups done. Who's racing first?" You bounced around a bit to ready yourself, "Steverino?" You asked and punched the air a few times.

"Get ready to cry afterwards" you high fived each other.

"Awe puddin' I'm not as soft as you" you pinched Steve's cheek and he shooed you away, Bucky felt a little left out and felt a sharp pang in his heart. What was that? He didn't know but whatever it was made him uncomfortable and a little angry.

"You ready Buck?" Steve asked Bucky, who zoned out a bit.

"Yeah, I'll be at the end" Bucky ran to the designated tree quite fast, "Ready?!" He yelled, "3,2,1, Go!"

You pushed Steve aside and he buckled a little, you felt really confident this time, the wind blew through your hair so fast it felt like a punch. But because you were cocky you decided to look back and what does Steve decide to do? Tackle you. Of course he landed on the ground so you wouldn't get hurt, but you still felt winded.

"Ugh, you dick" you cursed and rolled onto your back, "Bucky! Who won?" You asked.

"No one darlin', you have about 3ft left" he responded. You panicked and tried crawling but Steve pulled you back. So you did the same to him and when he got to his feet you were attached to his front, clinging like a sloth.

"I win!" You kissed Steve's forehead.

"You did not. I was the one crossing the line, your big butt just got in the way!"

"My butt is perfectly normal sized thank you very much. I was first to get over the line I think our eye witness can amount for that" you draped your arms around Bucky's waist, his body was a lot tighter than you originally thought.  
You looked up to him he smiled and shrugged his shoulders at Steve.

"Fine! Winner versus Y/N! Bucky, you and me right now"

"Good luck" you slapped Bucky's fine derriere.

The two men got ready, the determination on their face was so serious, it's only a short race guys, calm down.

"On your marks, get set...go!" The two ran so fast, faster than Usain Bolt thanks to their superhuman capabilities. That they passed you in a blur. "Uhm" that really shot down your self confidence.

"Yeah!" Bucky cheered. Oh, he won! "Come on sweet, you and me. I'm not going easy on ya"

"Fair enough" you replied. you had a plan, yeah it was cheating to jump on the back of your opponent but you still would have crossed the finish line right?

After the final race Steve gave you some water, "your tactics aren't that flawed" you bowed to say thank you.

"It's harder to hold on," you say as your hand instinctively goes to Steve's biceps, "than it is to run"

"Well congratulations sweetie" Steve replied, his eyes darted to Bucky, who he noticed was checking you out.

"Thanks mister" you nudged Steve.

"You did really well too Bucky" you patted his shoulder as you passed him. Bucky couldn't help but smile at your cuteness.

...

Back the tower everyone was called into a meeting, this meeting excluded you and Bucky as you two were not officially part of the Avengers clan.   
You two sat on the lounge watching TV, you kept looking at the door expecting Steve to come in and ask you to go for coffee or a run like he always does.

You admitted to Steve a few months prior that you had feelings for him but he didn't feel the same, to be fair, you were drunk when you admitted it so the fact that he didn't make a move was polite. A few days after that embarrassing moment you told Steve that you wanted to be friends because you have always admired his dedication to this job. Ever since then you two have always made spontaneous 'dates' which then become part of your regular routine, like grabbing lunch or going for a work out.

"You okay, sugar?" Bucky interrupted your moment. You realised he came closer to you.

"Yeah, sorry. Just zoned out for a sec," you readjusted to face him, he was a lot closer than you thought.

"You think they're talking about us?" He raised his arm and put it on the back of the seat.

"Maybe. There's also the chance of another mission that only they have access too" you said sourly, but regretted being hostile, "sorry. I guess it still hurts to not feel trusted"

"I understand, with my past experiences...I definitely understand" he held your hand as a sign of support. You smiled and traced lines on his knuckles, "Y/N,"

"Yeah?" You looked up. He opened his mouth bug stopped himself from talking. How could he confess his adoration for you over these past few months, he knows you have feelings for Steve, its obvious. But Bucky couldn't help but feel like there was something special between you two, you're always there for him as a shoulder to cry on, you support and defend him when everyone else is against him, you help him adjust to this life that seems to be so unadaptable. He really felt love and now couldn't imagine his life without you.

"Um, do you want to get dinner?" His smile didn't reach his eyes but yours did. You keep seeing Bucky in a new light, he's like his delectable, forbidden fruit. Why forbidden? You had no idea, a part of you was holding out for Steve, hoping he'd whisk you off your feet one day.

"Yeah of course," you grinned. Bucky let out a sigh of relief, you two had spent some alone time together lately but this is what Bucky would constitute as a date, "I know this really nice place a few blocks away, they make the greatest soft shell crab in he world!" You grinned some more, Bucky was just as excited as you, "you will have to change though, just into some nice jeans and a button down shirt" you touched his pec through his shirt, he felt shivers and took a deep breath. You couldn't help but notice how strong he is. Everyone in the Avengers has muscles but Bucky was different, his beauty came from within as well and you truly appreciated all the late night venting sessions you had with him. You've even confessed to him about your crush on Steve, but something is changing with you and Bucky, you feel more connected with him, he was more sensitive and caring and you found it refreshing when everyone around you seemed like a robot at times.

"What's going on here?" Steve interrupted. Your head turned to meet his gaze, it was stern.

"Just planning to go to dinner" you smiled, Steve didn't.

"Where are we going?" He asked. You opened your mouth and breathed, getting ready to break the news.

"Actually it's just the two of us, sort of like a date. Wanna help me pick out an outfit?" Bucky grinned and winked at Steve, your eyes and mouth widened, but you quickly maintained it.

Steve smiled, he was hurt. He knew you weren't his, but he felt like Bucky was ruining a certain atmosphere between you and Steve. Things had certainly changed since you and Bucky have started hanging out. He should have never rejected you that night, but you were drunk and he thought you were half-joking. The truth is that he has feelings for you, how could he not? He's even imagined changing your last name to his.   
Steve is an Avenger and feels like he can't mix business with pleasure, friendship is perfectly fine to him, because then at least he still gets to see you everyday. Steve didn't realise he was holding his breath, he let out a laugh to get his breathing back to normal.

"No problem" he smiled then looked down and went to his bedroom.

...

"What do you think?" Bucky asked Steve. Steve looked up from his phone which contained paragraphs and paragraphs of confessions of love for you.

"You look great" Steve got up, he hardly smiled but kept content.

"I can't believe she said yes. To be honest with you, I've had this little thing for her for a while now, I guess she's finally over you" Bucky straightened his shirt. Steve was snapped out of his miserable trance.

"What? She told you about..." he trailed off, Bucky nodded and gathered his wallet and phone.

"Yeah, I've known for a few months now but she's slowly gotten over you"

"Slowly? How many months?" Steve crossed his arms and his brows were furrowed with curiosity.

"I'm not sure, maybe 4"

That was around the time she confessed, Steve thought. This means that Bucky and Y/N have been close friends for a while now. Steve was furious at himself for taking you for granted, thinking you'd just wait around for him until he was comfortable to date.

"Be good" Steve gripped Bucky's shoulder a bit too hard at the entrance.

You entered the space and caught your breath. Bucky looked amazingly handsome, so delectable that you might do something rash tonight.  
You saw the two men at the entrance. Steve's mouth hung a little open, you looked beautiful in your burgundy dress. It's been a while since you put on make up at the last function in Prague. Steve remembered you went as his date, you two seemed to dance perfectly together, reading each others bodies seemed so easy. You've only gotten more beautiful as time goes by.

"Hey beautiful" Bucky grinned, he was so excited to finally get a proper date with you.

"Hey handsome" you nervously smiled back, "Steverino, I'll see you later for the gossip" you kissed Steve's cheek. All of these overwhelming feelings made Steve sick. No wonder Tony is always eating or drinking or working.

"Don't wait up" Bucky told Steve, you two were interlocking arms on your way out.

...

"That food sure was amazing" Bucky confirmed.

"Thank you" you replied, leaning on him. You two were in the elevator on the way up, still holding hands. It was a magnificent date, you stained your dress with soy sauce so Bucky poured some sweet chilli on his shirt. You two found conversing so easy, it was really nice to be normal for once.

"And thank you for tonight, let's do it again soon" you kissed his cheek. Bucky smiled at how comfortable your body language was with him. To be fair, you were a sleepy and oblivious drunk. The elevator doors opened and he walked you to your room.   
You two faced each other while holding hands, "Seriously, thank you so much I haven't felt so relaxed and happy in a long time" you thanked and hugged him. He hugged you back tightly.

Bucky was nervous now, rid was the moment he's been waiting for for months now. Once you separated, Bucky pulled you into a kiss. This wasn't just a peck, this was passionate and dreamy. Your hands travelled to his waist and pulled him closer. After a few seconds you two separated again to breathe. You gave him a finishing peck and said goodnight. You watched him walk away and couldn't help but grin. You finally feel that connection with someone at the start of a relationship, you didn't ever want it to go away.

You opened your bedroom door and took your shoes off. Steve was asleep in your bed, what was he doing there? Your lamp was on so he didn't wake up, he was snoring a little bit and you giggled.

You thought it was safe to change into your pyjamas, which was just a nightgown. You decided it was inappropriate to let Steve sleep in your bed after just going on a date with Bucky. So you stood over him and tried to wake him up.

"Steve..stevey, wake up" you gently nudged him. His eyes blinked and he adjusted to the light.

"Y/N" he said.

"What are you doing in my bed?" You asked.

"Um...you said you would have gossip for me" Steve was a respectable figure, he knew you and Bucky would have a good night and he wasn't going to get between you two.

"You're such a cutie" you pinched his cheeks. Suddenly you had flashbacks to the last time you were drunk around Steve. It didn't end well, "I still think about you" you whispered. But before you could confess that you like Bucky, Steve pulled you onto him and kissed you. This was more heated than sweet. His tongue was in your mouth, hands all over you and even some light grinding. But you stopped him, you flopped onto your regular side of the bed and caught your breath.

"I love you Y/N I'm so sorry I never told you and I'm sorry I took you for granted"

"This confuses things" you admitted.

"What?" Steve said breathlessly.

"I..I said yes to Bucky's invitation to dinner because...well, I really like him Steve. I never thought that in a million years you would actually want to be with me so I put myself out there. I'm sorry..I-I don't want to wait around for you all the time"

"Wait, but you just said-"

"I wasn't expecting that reaction. One part of me is ecstatic but another feels guilty. Bucky and I have really been connecting for a while and he understands me...I think your job gets in the way too much"

"Is that the primary reason you don't want to be with me?" You didn't answer, "because James is training to join us soon"

You frowned, not because of Bucky becoming an Avenger but because you're not.

"Soon, he'll be as distant as I am and I apologize if I have ever neglected you in the past" Steve's tone has changed, he's more formal. You didn't like it.

"Please leave my room I feel very tired" you spoke with the same tone then turned to sleep on your side.

"Y/N I'm telling you the truth. Bucky will be away for a while if he accepts his test missions, up to 3 months" Steve tried turning you but you wouldn't budge.

"Of course he'll accept" you muttered, "I'll see you tomorrow" you turned your lamp off and went to sleep. Once you heard the door shut you wept a little. Thinking of how unfair Steve is being to you right now, if he liked you why didn't he say anything before you built a relationship with Bucky? You don't want to be torn between two men, it's way too awkward.


	2. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ball time! Hope y'all like getting balled.
> 
> Bucky snaps tbh

A few months had passed and you and Bucky were officially 'going steady' he even bought you a bracelet. In fact he keeps buying you stuff; dinner, flowers, little knick knacks that he knows you'll appreciate. You felt like a princess to him and could feel yourself falling for him.

Then Steve comes along and ruins every moment, for example, this morning Bucky made you waffles and Steve ate half of your plate and rushed off for your run.

"You know its rude to eat another person's breakfast" you commented while stretching on a bench.

"They were amazing, I can honestly say that my best friend is the best boyfriend in the world"

"Aw I'm so glad to hear, should I buy you an anniversary present?"

"Hey! I'm allowed to be skeptical of any guy no matter how much I think I know them. You're still my girl I gotta protect you" you two sat opposite each other on the ground with legs spread apart and holding each others hands beginning to lean back forth.

"What's all this interruption really about?" You asked but received no answer, Steve just looked away and shrugged. You asked the dreaded question "do you still have feelings for me?" You both paused, sitting up straight.

Steve looked back to you, he hesitated. What was he supposed to say? _Yes y/n I'm in love with you and I have been for a very long time, longer than Bucky!_ But of course he couldn't. It's selfish to try and spend time with you when you're with Bucky but he can't help it. Bucky came out of nowhere and suddenly he's your favourite person? Steve was also upset at the amount of time you two spend together without him, Bucky was his everything back in the day. Steve thought you two had a special thing going on, he guessed he missed his shot. That doesn't mean he's going to give up spending time with you, you're still his friend and his adoration for you will not affect the friendship...or so he thinks.  
  
"I love you in a way that...that," he coughed and gulped, his nails dug into his thigh. He wanted to hit himself for not preparing a simple sentence for this exact question, he knew it was coming soon. Steve was practically a third wheel when hanging out with you and Bucky. He made you so happy and Steve couldn't help but interrupt any cuddle times, he knew that Bucky's kind nature and loyalty to him would defeat any jealousy he had concerning your friendship with Rogers.

"In a way...that a cat loves a post" good one, Steve.  
You tilted your head and furrowed your brows in confusion.

"Okay. That's...good to hear" you chuckled and quickly squeezed his ankle because it was the only thing in reach. You didn't want to leave Steve alone because he was clearly upset but you felt that if you stayed and gave him any comfort that you'd be crossing a line. Your feelings for Steve have definitely changed, but because of your history, you felt that those memories may be toxic to your relationship with Bucky. You didn't know what to do.

"Hey, you two" Bucky sat next to you. You grinned as you saw your boyfriend with the long gorgeous hair.

"Hey," you said in unison with Steve except you sounded enthusiastic and Steve...not so much.

"I thought we'd get a second breakfast, I don't know if you've heard of this meal called brunch. It sounds amazing, it's not a snack like a morning tea, it's more of a meal but not too much of a meal that you fill up before lunch" you had to stop yourself from giggling at how cute he was.

"That sounds so good but Steve and I have a boxing session soon and then I have to pick out an outfit for that ball. Which reminds me, what size are you?" You told him while gripping his thigh. He looked down then towards Steve-who saw your hand, his face was stone cold.

"I'm not sure. I'll see you back at the tower then?" His tone was a little pissed off, this pleased Steve. Knowing he had a shot at courting you made him feel ecstatic and guilty at the same time. Bucky just felt upset that Steve wasn't happy for him for finding someone to connect with. Steve was being selfish and if their friendship was going to falter because of you, let it happen. It just means he can't set aside his differences.

"Okay, see ya" you two kissed and Bucky went back to wherever he came from. Steve's head was down, he couldn't look at the two of you kissing.

"Let's get to the gym" Steve got up and fiddled with his keys, "so what are you wearing tonight?" He asked as he held the punching bag upfront of you.

"Um, I was thinking either white or red. Maybe yellow even, something out of the box you know?" You spoke breathlessly.

"There's this good boutique around that I know of. I could show you some dresses. You could do a little fashion show for me" Steve seemed like his old self again. You smiled.

"Yeah, that'd be good"

...

Seriously that dress shop was amazing, you got exactly what you needed.

"Do you think Bucky will like it? It's quite traditional" you asked Steve on the way home. It was already 2pm and you needed to nap.

"How did you feel in it?" Steve asked. You felt like a princess, the belle of the ball. It made you feel confident and regal, ready to face anything head on.

"Powerful" you chose.

"Then it's perfect" Steve messed up your hair.

...

Going to a ball alongside Steve made you nervous. It made you think of that night you two were all over each other. Let's hope history doesn't repeat itself.

"Oh my goodness" Bucky held his heart and had a pained expression. You frowned.

"What's wrong?" You rushed near him.

"I never thought I'd be so lucky to be in the company of an angel" he gave you a kiss and a hug. You couldn't hide the grin. During the hug, you noticed he had gotten a haircut. You pushed him away.

"What happened to your hair?!" He looked so sexy with his hair out of his face.

"You don't like it?" His puppy dog eyes looked worried.

"I'm contemplating staying in with you all night" you grabbed his butt then pulled him in for another kiss. He cleaned up well, you couldn't take your eyes off of him, neither could anyone at the ball. It was a charity ball, auctioning off women for a date with an eligible bachelor. Apparently, you had agreed to it although you have no recollection of ever saying yes. Neither did Wanda or Nat.

"I don't know if I feel comfortable letting you go on a date with a...bachelor" Bucky admitted to you so you gave him a hug.

"Awe, no ones taking me away from you"

"Not even Steve" he muttered. Jealousy showing. You moved back, shocked that he'd say something like that.

"No. Not even America's sweetheart okay? If you're uncomfortable with how much time I spend with a certain someone, I understand, okay? But I told you what happened a few months ago, I chose you. I'm lucky enough that you accepted me, and little comments like that really piss me off because it means you don't trust m...I'm getting another drink to calm down" you walked over to a table with a lot of champagne glasses on it. You grabbed one and it went down with ease, you grabbed another and decided to let it sit because all the bubbles made you sick.

"Hey gorgeous, how would you like to see- oh it's you" Tony approached you, "sorry, I'm not used to seeing you in anything other than work out leggings, shirt and that weird messy bun thing you do with chopsticks or something" he took a sip of his whisky.

"Why are men such arseholes?" You asked.

"How much have you had to drink?" He asked. You gave him an unimpressed look so he ignored his question, "well in my expert opinion, being a male myself, I'd say that he loves you and doesn't want to lose you" the both of you stayed silent.

"Is that why Pepper left?" You asked, thinking you had crossed a line. He smiled, taking the joke on like a sport.

"No. I'm the excuse. I'm just an arsehole for the sake of being one" he told you. That cheered you up a bit, "he does love you though"

"Yeah...I know"

"He doesn't stop talking about you, it's quite annoying. Keeps saying you'll have 2 kids and live in Brooklyn. I even gave him some money for tonight so he'll just get out of my way and take you on a date. Like when is he going to shut up and take you? The big question is, are you ready to love him?" Tony kept speaking but you weren't really liking this question.

"Things have been tense for a while. Steve just keeps interrupting our time together-"

"Woah woah, you're dating the emo kid?" Tony asked, your eyes rolled.

"Yes. I'm going out with James. That's who we were talking about right?" You asked, Tony tried to find the words but couldn't.

"I-I- yes of course we were! I'm happy for you, get your butt up on stage they're about to call your name" he pushed you towards the stage.

"Stark" you scolded before entering the spotlight and smiled.

"Here we have the lovely Y/N Y/L/N, who is going to start the bidding?" The presenter announced.

"500 dollars"

"1000"

"2000"

"5000"

Who is making all these bets?

"10,000!" That's a voice you've heard before. Steve. Tony gave Steve money to buy you! You hid your fury through biting the inside of your cheek and smiling really widely.

"15,000" someone called out.

"Mr Stark, this is your charity event I'm afraid you can't bet" that makes no sense whatsoever, "where were we? 10,000 dollars for Mr Rogers" you breathed out slowly, you were going to punch Iron Man in the gut after this, "going once. Going twice and sold to Captain America himself! Come up and claim your prize" Bucky is going to be so upset.

Steve came up to you, he looked very handsome in his tuxedo, tailored just for him. You took his hand and gulped. You two joined the others on the dance floor since it was customary. You were getting flashbacks to how he held you, you missed Steve as a friend rather than some guy just hanging around you, which is what he felt like right now. He was holding you incorrectly, his hand that was supposed to be on your waist was a little lower down, so you corrected him.

"Sorry. You look beautiful by the way, I bet Bucky's heart stopped" he tried making conversation. You smirked, remembering Bucky's reaction to your look tonight.

"Yeah, he liked it. You look fantastic as always, golden boy" you complimented him, "so where did you get an extra 10k to blow on me?" You asked, already knowing the answer.

"Tony...he will probably never let me forget it" you both laughed.

"What's the plan for the date worth that much?"

"I have some things in mind, don't worry nothing too romantic" he winked, you smiled but it was wiped from your face when Steve was torn from you and tossed across the room.  
By Bucky.

"James!" You shrieked. He couldn't hear you, he was too focused on Steve. How dare he steal you away from him? He thought they were friends. Why couldn't he just keep to himself and let you be happy with Bucky? James could feel you slipping away from him and he clearly didn't like it.

Steve got up, only partially injured but quickly recovering. He grabbed a tray and blocked an oncoming left hook. "Why are you doing this buddy?" Steve asked. Bucky was furious, how can he still call him a friend?

"I'm not your buddy! You're trying to steal my girl!" Bucky kept throwing punches and Steve kept dodging and blocking them. Like an idiot, thinking you can go up against a superhuman. You tried holding Bucky's arm back, but he snapped and pushed you to the ground, winding you and hitting your head against the hard marble floor.

The fight didn't last too long as Tony's suits showed up and stopped the commotion. Wanda, Nat and Bruce were helping you breathe and helped you to your feet.  
"You gotta stay awake hon" Nat slapped your face a bit. Wanda shook her off and scolded her for slapping you. Bruce carried you back to the base and had a look at you.

...

"Remember, you can't fall asleep for a while. Drink some water" Nat said, she went to answer the little knock at your bedroom door. You couldn't see who was there but you had a gut feeling.

Nat crossed her arms over her chest. "You can't see her, she's resting"

"Doesn't she have a concussion?" The voice asked.

"Let him in, I want to talk to him," you told Nat, who waited outside. Steve was wearing an undershirt which exposed his bruises. He also had a cut lip and busted nose. But the worst thing about him was the look on his face, he felt so guilty he was on the verge of crying.  
Steve came and hugged you tightly. You returned the embrace.

"I'm so sorry. Are you feeling okay? Your pupils are huge, I never meant for this to happen" he spoke. You could hardly concentrate you were so tired but not allowed to sleep.

"I'm fine, how's Bucky? What did Tony do to him?" Tony was protective of you so James was in a lot of trouble.

"I don't know, you don't need to worry about anyone was yourself okay?" Steve kissed your forehead.

"How are you doing?" You rubbed his arm, he always loved when you did that but it was frustrating when you didn't listen to him.

"I'm fine, I'm perfect, in tip-top shape. You need to stay awake sweetie, hey! Y/N! Stay awake! It's important"

"What's important? I need to talk to you but I forgot what about" you paused, "why did you buy me? Bucky felt jealous already because we're close and then you had to do that thing you know? Why did you do that thing?" You were confused but hung on to what the main message was.

"I'm so sorry, doll. I just feel the need to be around you all the time, I can't stop myself. I can't help the way I feel about you" he tucked a few strands of hair behind your ear.

"Okay...okay then..." your eyes started to close but his warm hands made your eyes open by force.

"Have to stay awake bub"

"But I'm tired...how's Bucky?" And that was you for the night.


	3. 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You and Bucky have a chat

You haven't seen Bucky since that night. Steve said that he had been in a cell downstairs, one similar to the Hulk's on the helicarrier. No toilet, no shower, no sink, just floor and glass a foot thick in case he tried breaking out. Stark wanted you to rest and recover before seeing him. You didn't really bother talking to anyone for a week or so, this concerned Steve. He tried keeping his distance at first but he couldn't let you mope around all the time so he tried inviting you for runs but you declined each time. Then he tried inviting you out for food, then you declined.

A walk? Declined.

A coffee? Declined.

The living room? Declined.

The truth is, you were contemplating ending things with Bucky. It's true that you two have drifted a little and you felt disconnected these recent weeks but nothing was pushing you away from him, you felt content and comfortable. That night was scary though, you've seen Bucky fight before but you've never seen his anger blind him. And although you've been in hefty battles, you've never been thrown to the ground, what if one day you two were to fight and he lashed out? It's true you could protect yourself against normal people, but that metal arm? You weren't too sure.

"Y/N?" Steve tapped your head. You were eating breakfast together, sort of. Steve was eating and you let your cereal go soggy.

"Yeah?" You took the dishes to the sink.

"What's been going on with you?" His tone turned angry. This sparked you up as well but you kept your composure.

"I've been depressed. Thinking about breaking up with my boyfriend of only a short few months who had concussed me. But that's just half of it, I don't know if I'm part of the team-"

"Of course you're part of the team"

"Am I? Can I come to your meetings and briefings? Can I attend missions in other countries? Can I train with you guys?" You walked closer to him, he blinked and looked down with guilt. You took a deep breath.

"I also don't know where I stand with one of my closest friends who doesn't look at me as a friend anymore but as a mission to conquer" you started tearing up.

"What are you talking about?" Steve came up to hug you.

"You don't see me as a friend Steve. I know your feelings for me now and things are different between us" Steve let go. He knew you were right.  
You left to go cry in your room and Steve came in. "Please go away I don't want to talk," you said politely but he didn't listen. He came in and sat on the foot of the bed, timidly. The silence killed him mainly because he had all these thoughts running wildly around inside his mind, he didn't know what to say so he just spoke from the heart.

"It's true," he paused, still nervous about your reaction, "I don't want to really be your friend. I want to be more than that and I lost my chance, I took you for granted, I'm a complete idiot. I apologise for that, I've always had feelings for you and I shouldn't have hidden them for the sake of...my stupid brain" you listened intently to what he was saying, "Y/N I love you too much to leave you. I understand that you feel left out around here and I want to talk to the others about you joining us...officially"

You looked up, "really?" You smiled gently, Steve loved that he could do that. If only he could kiss you any time he wanted.

"Of course. I want you to be happy in every conceivable way. I'm sorry I'm the cause for your distress"

"What are you talking about?" You asked, he hesitated before speaking.

"It's my fault you never got into the Avengers, I never brought it up and truly I often forgot about your feelings. I thought of you as mine. My friend, my special someone, I didn't even like sharing you with the girls, it was selfish of me I can see that now"  
You weren't too angry with Steve, just extremely disappointed. You didn't speak because of the shock. Your best friend, your closest companion whom you trust with everything you have, has been the reason why you haven't progressed in your career. How do you react?

You don't, of course.

You two sat in a tense stillness for a few long seconds, neither wanting to speak first. Steve opened his mouth a few times to speak but nothing ever came out so he just left, but before doing so he stopped by the door.

"You should see Bucky..." he mumbled before exiting.

*

"Bucky," you entered slowly. Bucky stood up straight away as soon as he saw you and came close to you. His or hand left steam against the glass.

"What are you doing here?" Bucky looked panicked, "they said I wasn't allowed to see you.." his gaze travelled down your body, searching for any bruises or marks.

"Snuck in...Friday looped footage of you sleeping...thank god for AI right?" you studied his features too, Bucky could sense impending doom coming his way. You weren't here for a kiss and cuddle.

"I'm so sorry princess. You know I never mean to hurt anyone, especially you and I'm so angry with myself," Bucky's voice broke as he punched the glass, "I love you and I promise I'll never..." he couldn't promise that he'd never lose his temper because he couldn't control himself. He agreed to this, to be locked up like some sort of animal. The two of you were just staring at each other, playing chicken.

"James-" 

"Don't, please let's talk about this. Don't..."

"I can't risk being hurt again, you didn't even snap out of your rage to help me. The only reason I didn't die was because Wanda caught me with her force," you paused, swallowing your sobs. He was tearing up but breathing heavily, calming himself.

"Has Steve had any say-?"    
You shook your head.

"Don't bring him into this, all he said was to talk to you and nothing more. You don't have to be in here," you walked up to the glass and put your hand to his, "why are you doing this to yourself?"

"I'm sick" Bucky spat and turned, storming the other way. You walked the control pad and entered a few digits to access it, "what are you doing?" he noticed the beeping.

"I'm unlocking the door. I know you're healthy and I know that you feel you're reverting back to...your time, but you're not. It's just a hiccup Buck," you walked and opened the door, holding it open, "you'll be okay," Bucky shook his head and walked backwards.

"I'm not safe," the fear in his eyes weren't for you, he was afraid of himself. You sighed, clearly not getting through to him, that's when something stupid happened, you walked in. "what are you doing?!" Bucky ran for the closing door, which had automatically locked once closed.

"If you're such an animal you'd kill me in here. I don't believe you will," Bucky stormed towards you desperately. Grabbing you by the shoulders.

"You can't be in here with me, I need to be alone-"

"You've always been alone. Let me help you," you begged. Bucky once again studied your delicate features, his adam's apple bobbed up and down and that familiar burn ran down his throat. You walked closer to him and took his hand, Bucky missed you. He missed holding your soft skin, he missed looking into your gentle eyes and seeing them full of adoration- something he noticed when he looked up at you then-but something has changed.

"Okay," he squeezed your hand, "how're we gonna get outta here, doll?" You smiled at his acceptance and the nickname.

"F. R. I. D. A. Y, could you let us out please?" You called out. You walked bucky back to his room in silence.

"I feel like I should be walking you back," he sighed, "about before-" Bucky stopped you from leaving, his hand brushed your hip but he retrieved it, now fiddling with his fingers like they were gloves he wanted to pull off. Bucky's breathing deepened and he could feel the tears starting again, he didn't want to let you go-"um," he cleared his throat.

"It's alright," your comforting hand warmed Bucky's, "we'll speak soon," although your demeanour was calming and kind, Bucky knew those words had a serious meaning, "goodnight Buck," you leaned in to softly kiss his rough stubble, it sent warmth down his chest. Maybe things will be alright.

*

 


	4. 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone is out on a mission except for you and Bucky.  
> What's the worst that could happen?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the lateness, I'm rewriting some chapters

It was a good week.

That's it.

That's the week.

It wasn't great but at least it wasn't terrible. It started off a little disappointing because you were hoping to make sure Steve talked to someone about you 'auditioning' for a proper spot on the team but he was out on a mission in Myanmar and wouldn't be back for a week. It seemed like everyone was out, there wasn't much you could really do besides work out or catch up on some paperwork Tony was always blabbering on about. Your eyes darted to Bucky's room, he's not out, surely? Tony probably thinks he's still in his chamber.

You slowly walked to Bucky's door and knocked, no response. With a sigh, you stepped back but heard the squeak of the hinges and saw him. He gleamed in the morning sun, chest wet with droplets and hair pushed back behind his ears like Prince Charming. He was truly a sight.

"Hey," he smiled and recognised he was in just a towel. After what happened at the auction, you two were a bit confused about your relationship.

"Hey," you had to focus your eyes on his face and not become distracted by his body, "do you know where everyone is?"

"I think everyone's in Asia right now," he was still leaning against the door, knowing what he was doing to you-he liked the way you were looking at him and stuttering over your words, breathing heavily whenever he talked.

"Really?" Your tongue poked your cheek, thinking about why no one let you know, "there's not even a note on the fridge," you tore your eyes away from him and stepped back, heading towards the kitchen. Before heading down the well-lit hallway you turned on your heel, "put a shirt on, I'll make you some eggs,"

Bucky smiled, realising  that perhaps your relationship wasn't doomed after all, "poached?"

"Omelette?" You frowned, poaching is way too hard right now.

"Fine, but you have to use that special ingredient you know I love," Bucky loved this back and forth of teasing.

"It's just-"

"Don't ruin it by telling me!" Bucky stuck his arm out to stop you then closed his door to get changed. You hummed while making breakfast, something that caught the both of you by surprise.

"So is everyone in Myanmar?" You asked once you served.

"Myanmar?"

"Burma. They changed the name back to Myanmar in '89. Steve told me he'd be there for maybe a week, are the others there?" Bucky had his mouth full and tried talking through it just like he used to when he finally felt comfortable because you also did it sometimes.

"Um...Nat's in Laos with Wanda. Sam is.."

"Just finish your food," you giggled at the idiot before you. Bucky choked a little because he couldn't stop smiling.

"Sorry, ahem. Um, Sam's in Vietnam with Vision and I think Tony and Rhodey are in China,"

"Any idea why?"

"I think HYDRA has a facility in China and they're trying to dismantle the missiles instead of attacking the base head-on," a comfortable silence followed.

"Do you sometimes read mission reports? Even if you haven't been on said mission."

Bucky coughed, not wanting to get in trouble, "um, no. That-that's not allowed," he shrugged, you smiled knowingly at him. A small silence followed, it wasn't necessarily uncomfortable but you both felt the need to do something. 

And by now it was either talk or fuck.  
Nothing had died down between you two, the tension was always there but even more so whenever there was a lull.  
Especially when all you could do was stare at each other at this moment. His features were rough but beautiful; chiselled jaw, ocean eyes, plump lips; it was almost too much. Bucky felt it too, his heart was palpitating in his chest just being around you.

"I think I'm just going to get to training. Thank you for the eggs," he smiled softly. You let him go, perhaps it wasn't a good idea being around him for the moment. 

You went against all logic anyway and decided to join him.  
Walking in ten or so minutes after he started in just a sports bra and high waisted leggings that shaped you perfectly, Bucky was yours again. You entered sipping on your water and having it spill on your chest, a hiccup from you but for a touch starved super soldier? You might as well have been in a sexy commercial. 

Bucky tripped a little on the treadmill, creating a loud thump on the other end of the gym. Your head shot over to him but didn't speak; instead, you walked over to warm up.  
Bucky decided that being near you wasn't good for him and immediately jogged over to the boxing section to let out some...feelings.

Now it was your turn to look slyly. Bucky was hitting the punching bag pretty hard, you could see that his straight posture was due to his tight core muscles, and honestly, your core muscles were feeling it too. The skins he was wearing shaped his ass nicely and he knew it. To play it up, Bucky inserted from grunts as he punched the bag, knowing it was one of your favourite sounds he made in the bedroom.  
  
It was certainly working,  you weren't even running on the treadmill yet but you were breathing erratically already. It's been hard without him late at night; his warmth was something you craved more and more and lately, you could sure use a hug or two.

You ran for a few more minutes, hoping to rid yourself of these hot and bothered feelings. Closing your eyes and lip syncing to the music every now and then. Bucky looked back at you while he was on weights admiring your jumpy steps and soft smile, enjoying the tunes coming through your earbuds.

He missed you.

Bucky dropped his weight and sighed, the loud clanging sound interrupted your tranquil moment.

"Sorry!" he apologised with a wave. You just nodded back at him, calming down from the sudden shock. You licked your lips as he continued on with his shoulder work out, every time he breathed in his shirt lifted, exposing his very delicious looking v line. Your eyes trailed down slightly to his open crotch and you gulped, remembering how big he was. 

"Fuck me," you muttered and had a few gulps of water. Wiping your top lip and shaking out the nerves, you sauntered over to him, "hey, do you mind sparring with me today? Since everyone left." you leaned against the machine next to him.

Bucky's eyes immediately went to the curve of your side, "Sure, just another set."  
That gave him the opportunity to see you walk away from him in those leggings of yours. Soon, you were both strapped up and ready, "Be nice, I'm a little out of practice," Bucky winked.

"Don't worry. You can say you fell," you teased and landed a soft blow to his forehead. He faced up, a little shocked.

"Your point," he chuckled. Both of you had your mitts up, on the toes of your feet but unmoving.

You were scanning his body language, head down near his gloves, ready for an attack but his face spoke something else. He gulped, licking his lips as he scanned your face with his desperate eyes. You two didn't need to speak, you acted in unison; letting your mitts down and coming together in a steamy kiss. 

You two acted purely on nostalgia. Being without each other for so long had affected both of you more than you would ever admit; although in this moment, you didn't care.

"I missed you," Bucky admitted once you separated and began tearing each other's clothes off.

"I missed you."


End file.
